P.S. Your Cat is Dead!

Jimmy Zoole is not having a good day. He is realizing that after years as an actor, he is going nowhere. His one-man play is considered too avant-garde, so he loses his booking. It's New Year's Eve, and his girlfriend (Cynthia Watros, Mercy Streets, Blink of an Eye) wants to spend it apart. In the past year, someone broke into his apartment twice, stealing all of his belongings including the only copy of his novel (handwritten, of course). His beloved cat is in the hospital, and his night is about to get a lot worse. One can say something similar about Steve Guttenberg. Guttenberg hasn't done anything of note in close to fifteen years (Sheer Bliss or Home Team anyone?), and starring in P.S. Your Cat is Dead! is not going to take his career anywhere.

If this feels like a play, it is because it was. And a novel too, both by James Kirkwood, Jr. Guttenberg adapted (with the help of Jeff Korn) and handled directing duties on what essentially still feels like a play, just filmed on screen. Zoole goes home only to find that Eddie (Lombardo Boyar, Simone, Brother) is in his apartment. Eddie is in the process of robbing his apartment, and happens to be the guy who robbed it twice before. Zoole is understandably irked, and somehow ties Eddie to the sink. The bulk of the film is them arguing. Watros and some other people show up later, and more arguing ensues.

The fact that Zoole does what no rational human would even consider is a major off-putting factor in the film. Any normal person, even somebody under the stress that Zoole is under, would immediately call the police. He is just prolonging his own misery by tying Eddie up, and then pretty much deserves whatever happens, or almost happens. Guttenberg looks extremely dour, and the Zoole character is a whiny mess. He should come off as funny, but is so annoying that one wishes Zoole would lose somehow. The script just piles on the contrivances as the story progresses. The dialogue even tries to wax philosophical and also throws in some sexual confusion, but it is all for naught. Yes, Zoole's cat is dead, and so is this movie.

Mongoose Rates It: Pretty Bad.
1 hour, 32 minutes, Not Rated but contains language and some mature themes, possibly a PG-13, probably an R.

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